Cupcakes & Creativity: The Birthday Party I Always Wanted [PHOTOS]

I have this innate fear constantly looming inside my head, about the possibility of throwing a birthday party that no one would attend.

I’ve actually had many birthday parties. The only people on the guest list just so happened to be the same inhabitants of my home. Birthdays are a really big deal in my family, we go hard. (We eat cake and sing. Real turnt!) Growing up, I always wanted to invite loads of kids from school. My only childhood birthday party with unrelated guests was celebrated with two of my best friends from the 3rd grade, Renee and Kala. Being the only Black girl in my class, I always felt as though the other kids would mock my celebration behind my back, so I kept mum about my one and only party. Renee and Kala were different. I was their friend who just so happened to be Black, but the most important thing to them was the fact that I was their friend.

Birthday 10..or was it 11? Who wouldn’t want to show up to a Black N’Sync themed party..on my grandma’s porch?

Fast forward to age 16, I wanted to go all out for this huge milestone for every teen girl. Unfortunately, my insecurity about being stood up turned into a quiet night at home with the family. Age 18, another monumental year, was my first day of classes at Winthrop University. I had no friends on campus. My mother, drove two hours to make sure it was a birthday to remember. It was. Then 21 rolled around, from what I remember, yeah..I won’t go there. And at 25, I gave up on the ambition of ever throwing a party, and instead sat home eating a free Moe’s burrito (I am a prestigious member of their birthday club), reflecting on life and catching up on Scandal episodes. That night, a few friends and I went for dinner. It was a chill night, and when I realized that I didn’t need to have a huge blowout to celebrate my life.

So what does this have to do with my first event?

Three months ago when I presented the idea to my roommate of hosting an event for bloggers in Charlotte, I was instantly gung-ho about making it happen. I have blogger friends in New York, Chicago, Atlanta and other areas but none in my own backyard. She has a great eye for detail and wanted in on bringing my idea to life. We wrote down a plan of attack, then went to our respective bedrooms. As she moved on with life, I  closed my room door and embarked on a sleepless night with the lingering thought in my head “no one will show up”. The same one that always surfaced as a kid when I wanted to have a birthday party.

As the idea began to grow, I formulated the technical stuff, defined the aesthetics and outlined content for “Cupcakes & Creativity: #GirlsWriteIn”. As my team quickly helped me put this thing together,  I moved like a turtle in terms of promoting it. Then the doubt went into overdrive. Who am I to lead a session on blogging? What makes my perspective unique outside of the next blogger? Will anyone care? I went through weeks of secret mind battles. Confident on the outside, a nervous wreck on the inside. The first few early bird tickets were exciting, yet I still had my doubts. I get early bird tickets all the time, yet seem to never arrive. Will these people show up?

Then I had to give myself a reality check.

You cannot expect others to buy into your vision, if you’ve already sold out on it.

I got myself together, made my own flyer and pushed it out on social media.

So I chilled out with the insecurities and go to work. Four days before the event, we were 14 seats away from max capacity. Three days: 9 seats. Two days: no signups. One day before: 2 seats over our goal. By the day of, I had people inboxing me about paying at the door.

I’m like, where are these folks going to sit?

The day of the event, things were going to well. My presenters were set, all was clear at the venue and I had everything scratched off of my to-do list. What could possibly go wrong? Absolutely nothing. Never fall for the tactics of the enemy. My mind wanted me to believe that something should go wrong, while my heart finally believed in the beauty of my hard work. That didn’t stop my nerves from going berserk, but I didn’t allow them get the best of me.

Cupcakes & Creativity: #GirlsWriteIn was a smashing success. Alicia D. Dervin mixed in her writing expertise and challenged the attendees to deeply explore their imagination by storytelling using their own compass. Davida Jackson, iced the cake dropping SEO knowledge that I do not think anyone was ready for. I think most site owners quickly realized there’s more to just click and posting if you want a true web presence.

And she made them dab. Real trendy, D!

 

Yes, we #dab on ’em too. #GirlsWriteIn @called2connect made this happen!

A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on Dec 12, 2015 at 8:20am PST

Finally, I sprinkled on my tactics to engaging your social media audience and maximizing blog posts.

I actually said this in real life.

When I finished with the Q&A, I was ready to pack up and take it to the house. Do you really want to know what blew me away? Guests actually waiting in a line to personally speak to me one by one. I was so excited to personally hug and snap photos which each person, and learn out their projects. The feeling was overwhelming and I wish I had more time to hear more about their ideas.

I smiled on the outside, but this is archive footage of me on the inside.

This post is getting extremely lengthy. I am violating one of my own rules #GirlsWriteIn: keep it short! But I must wrap this by thanking my beautiful guests for giving their time and undivided attention to the workshop. Also, my wonderful sponsors: Leola & Simone, Coach Ashley Dash, Beautiful Uptown Girls Events. And, The Ryan Oneal Group for sponsoring several ladies.

Dope alert! Popcorn bags with my logo.

You’re not legit until you get special popcorn bags with your logo. Thanks @bugsweets!!! #GirlTyler #GirlsWriteIn A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on Dec 12, 2015 at 10:35am PST

 

 

 

And my team: Alica, Davida and Crystal. I can’t forget my all-star interns, Jasmine and Karina. I couldn’t have gotten of this done without you. I’d be lying if I said I pulled it off alone. #GirlsWriteIn was truly the best party a girl could have ever asked for. Thanks for being my special guests.

Take a look at the gallery. This is just the beginning.

 

 

 

And this…..A huge highlight for me…Look, a man!

 

#GirlsWriteIn + Man hahahaha #Charlotte #CLT #Blogger #Charlotteblogger #writer

A photo posted by Girl Tyler (@sheistyler) on Dec 12, 2015 at 8:19am PST