‘Tis the season, when I go home single. This marks the 7th Thanksgiving I’m going to visit my parents without a ring on my finger, a commitment or another breathing human at my side.
Me counting to see if 7 is indeed the accurate number of years I’ve been single come holiday time.
Yes, 2008 was the last time I took a boyfriend home for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
After he and I ended our four year “whatever the hell that was” relationship, I scaled back on introducing guys to my folks. Have I had boyfriends since then, yes? Have they been good enough to take home? No. For a number of reasons, I’ve deliberately decided to go home and stuff my face without being accompanied by the opposite sex. Before the lord became the center of my life, I knew better than to invite the men that I was being sinful with to meet my parents. “Hey mama, this is _______________. He comes over every Thursday night but don’t worry, he leaves before I get ready for work Friday.”
Live footage of how my mother would respond.
Once I finally came to terms with the fact that I manage to find myself not in a relationship come holiday time (90% by choice, other times not so much), I have lived with the burden of the speculation that comes with the territory.
6. The relatives trying to find single people they can fix you up with before the next holiday.
5. Driving home trying to concoct a lie about why you’re coming home solo.. again.
4. Facebook overpopulated with couple’s updates.
3. Wanting to send out cute holiday photos like your friends with families, then you realize you’d be alone in the photo.
2. Your love life being analyzed over dessert.
How sweet the sound of the relatives that try to psychoanalyze why you lack a significant other.
1. Your sexuality called into question.
Yes, I once had an unnamed relative who asked me if I “liked girls” because it had been so long since “we seent
you bring a boy around.”
Over the last seven years, I’ve grown to enjoy the holidays without the pressure of trying to find someone to convince my family that I am happy with. I’ve been known to cut ties before the weather turns cold. Family tends to get attached to relationships, why bring them into a situation that you’re not 100% sure about? This time of year is meant to spend it with loved ones, and not ones you wish could love you back. I’m just thankful for time spent with those I know are meant to be in my life. I’ve had plenty of time to rationalize my solitude.
It could be worse. I could have brought home a baby instead of a man and have no explanation as to how I got it.
